Japan Is Doomed

After a week or so of university related updates, I think it’s time for a return to my social commentary updates, and what better way to return to the exciting world of Japanese news than with this fantastic story;

An annual “crying sumo” contest for babies, in which pairs of infants are brought together to see who can cry the first or the loudest, was held at Tokyo’s Sensoji Temple on Sunday.

Sensoji. I’ve been there. I can’t remember if there were any crying children there or not, but I would assume if there was, the parents would have been frantically trying to stop their child from disturbing other visitors, right? Well, apparently one day a year the parents do the very opposite.

As you can see, these kids thought this crying thing was nonsense and were having none of it. I have to admit, I’d probably take a similar approach. Apparently, however, if the kids don’t start crying the people running the show don scary masks to make them cry. To be honest, I think just explaining to them exactly why they were being held up in the air would be enough to set most kids off. “You messed up my daily routine of crying and running around for this!?”

So whilst some kids didn’t cry, others took the “quicker I cry, quicker it’s over” approach, and appropriatly turned on the waterworks;

I feel the best way to stop this madness would be for the kids to all go on strike, but I do not mean any disrespect to the kid on the right in that photo. The poor thing is not letting the team down at all, because the man who is looking at hime there is the scariest man in the entire world.

Prepare yourself.

Aah! I think I’m going to start crying! Look at him! He clearly feeds on the tears of children! I like his hat though. Still, I don’t feel I’d be comfortable allowing the Elf of bad dreams here wander around listening to the screams of my baby child. That’s just me, though.

Of course, it’s all in good fun and I’m sure nobody takes it too seriously. Their website suggests the crying competition is just part of a big festival, and serves only as a bit of light entertainment. But come on guys, can’t we have something more normal like running races or Super 100m Beetle Back Janken Sumo Pen Spinning? I know which I’d rather see.

Thanks to CNN/Getty Images for the photos.

This entry was posted on Monday, April 28th, 2008 at 2:12 am and is filed under Culture. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.