31 & 32. Neil: Yeah, originally I was worried this post would just cause problems but I think it’s kind of given everyone new perspectives. I think I’m going to try to be more understanding and read between the lines and see what the author is really saying.

Oh please, “misogyny/objectification garbage I see” ….. come here and live life for longer than your12 month sojourn and see things are different to what your study group tells you.

“Amae is an outdated theory from the 70s that has been pretty much proven worthless in modern academia” this sort of statement is ridiculous and just shows you’re looking to the wrong source for “answers” to what are just my observations.

Anyway, keep up the interesting blog Mike, i look forward to reading more in the future and good luck with your trip back here in 80 odd days time.

Firstly, “That “Amae” is a term created by academics has little relevance to this discussion.” is an odd statement considering the article in question contains a full paragraph defining it and making it relevent to the point.

I’m not saying the “Lolita Complex” does not exist, nor am I saying in it’s essence it’s a bad thing. Obviously it has bad connotations but it could be totally innocent and healthy, to a certain extent. What I am saying is Not All Japanese Men Like Younger Women. This makes statements like “Maybe because Japanese men do like younger women.” problematic and, ultimately, wrong. I just wish people would make that distinction. You’d be annoyed if someone said “Well, there’s a lot of interracial marriage in Japan, and statistics show it’s White Caucasian Men and Japanese women, so ALL WHITE MEN LIKE JAPANESE GIRLS”. That doesn’t make sense. I don’t see why this one doesn’t and yet the other one does.

That “Amae” is a term created by academics has little relevance to this discussion. Its just a word used to describe some of the behaviour he has seen. And is perfectly plausable that academics have less knowledge than a normal person of the behaviour Neil was talking about.

I don’t have time to respond to every point but I will for this one. Neil writes “Japanese men like younger women” Which you seem to have taken some great issue with. Despite what you believe this is well recognised in Japanese society and in many cases true. Lolita complex is more pronounced amoung Japanese people than in any other nation. There is a reason so many shops sell lolicon material - because it sells well - and why does it sell well? Maybe because Japanese men do like younger women. Not to mention, is it really such an insult? Most men like beautiful women, younger women tend to more beautiful than older women. Thats not an insult thats biology.

I honestly am proud of my writing and it’s rare that I tackle such a subject. But if you honestly believed someone was treating a race inappropriately, are you telling me you’d address the situation in a light hearted manner?

Finally 4~) I do disagree with the phrasing of “Japanese men like their girls submissive”, just the word submissive seems inappropriate. However I disagree further with your reaction Mike to the last sentence. To me it seems to be written in pure sarcasm, a play on the stereotype of this ‘Submissiveness.’ Your reaction turns into almost a personal attack on Neils state of mind. If you professed an opinion that you felt it was harsh, and described how you read it, I’d feel less strongly about this. But instead you State that the sentence shows Neil agrees fully. That is Not an opinion.

I really hate to present such a one-sided arguement but I can’t agree on your analysis of Neil’s writing. I enjoy your blog Mike, You’re funny and present things well. Hell, if I am in Tokyo the same time as you I’ll try my hardest to meet up with you. I just can’t agree at all with you here.

Craig.

Ultimately, whether i agree with Neil on the generalisations doesn’t matter, I found his Article a good read, well written and in good humour.

I can only go by whats on mikes post as i presume it still contains the original writings by Neil, but Mike?! I’ve seen this kind of over-reaction from someone who isn’t fluent in English, Someone who finds it difficult to establish tone from a piece of writing. Its blatently evident that Neils post was written in light-heartedness. I can only really describe why I feel like this by going through the 4 quotes and issues you’ve had with said post.

1~) Girl Maturity. I for one totally agree with Neil, Young adult Japanese girls do display less maturity. Whereas you derive from this that you can “push these grown up kids around”. C’mon, Theres obviously something already present in your mind to think this, Neil gave no indication what so ever of abusing this lack of Maturity. I for one LOVE the maturity level Young japanese girls display (note: ‘Display’) Its refreshing, compared to the more adult girls in the UK. - You cannot call my opinion unacceptable, because its light-hearted, my feelings on the subject. People prefer different types of girls, mature girls, fun girls etc. Neil claimed that the majority of Japanese young adults display a lack of maturity compared to other countries. From personal experience I totally agree with him. And I like this kinda girl, as Neil also said. All of this is Irrelevant to what i’m saying though. Your Reaction. Yes you are entitled to an opinion, but read it properly. Like i said, I’d expect that kind of mis comprehension from a non-native English speaker, not you.

2~) I can’t even begin to comprehend how you couldn’t understand what he meant by his two friends. I really can’t. It almost seems as if you are purposely looking for things to snipe at.

3~) I’d really have a problem here, if Neil said obvious generalizations here “ALL japanese men” etc. But he doesn’t. Japanese men like younger girls. Fair Do’s. To a large degree I agree with him. Christmas pudding? Its a phrase he’s heard been used. As far as I’m aware, his writing doesn’t show him in favour of this phrase, regarding what he said at the end of the quote. It only makes him a better blogger in my eyes, He speaks like I’d speak to my mates, honestly.